Thursday, April 28, 2016

Baby Gwendolyn's Magnificent Water Birth

My sweet Gwen was born Sunday, April 17th at 7:47pm at the University of Utah hospital. I think back to that day and so much peace and overwhelming joy fill my thoughts. Not just because I've got my sweet Gwen with me now, but because it actually defied all of the negative perceptions associated with childbirth while simultaneously gifting me with a labor I'd be happy to do again tomorrow. From start to finish it was one of the most blissful, spirit filled days. Each baby I have teaches me I have much more capacity to love than I realized.

The day started the night before, as most birth stories do. I stayed up until 3am watching "Kimmy Schmidt" on Netflix with Aaron and drawing a "Welcome Home" sign for the baby on my chalkboard. Girl was paying attention. I wasn't able to sleep all night. By 6am I felt an irregular pattern of contractions and I tapped Aaron awake. "Just wanted to let you know we are definitely meeting our girl today!"

I got Lake out of her crib for the day and snuggled her in our rocking chair. It felt so crazy knowing those were my last moments with my only child so I held onto her extra long. With every contraction that pulsed through my body, I looked at my Lakey and they got easier.

"Another baby's coming, you say? Whatcho talkin' bout, Willis? Okay, that's cool with me!"
Around 11am my doula, Amanda, came over and started to massage my hands and feet. It made me relax and feel really cared for. I realized I needed someone to coach me through the birth when I started having preterm contractions at 33 weeks and they scared the living daylights out of me. I was so unprepared for the pain and so fearful of the physical toll of labor. After my preterm contractions cooled down and I was released from the hospital, I immediately went on the internet and found Amanda. I am so grateful that I did. And see, everything happens for a reason. The spectacular birth experience I had was in large part thanks to her!

I had so many affirmations swirling through my head to help prepare my mind for the birth. Having Amanda there to tell them to me kept my thoughts positive and my mental state clear and free from stress. It was a great advantage to have given birth before and know exactly what I needed to hear and when. I know how I did with Lake, so it was like taking a test I already took once and was able to go back and study for!

The words to "How Great Thou Art" calm me every time I think of them. Through each contraction whether in the shower, eating lunch, or doing my hair, I'd start to repeat to myself, "Oh Lord my God, when I in awesome wonder, consider all the worlds Thy hands have made." It sounds weird, but just those simple lyrics tell me so much about God and my relationship to Him. This baby was going to come out of me. It was going to be hard. But I was ready to be used by God as an instrument of His love, demonstrating I'd do anything for my children like a reflection of His love for us in Jesus Christ.

After a call to one of my midwives around 3pm, she advised that we head to the hospital soon. Thankfully, my labor this time came in distinct contractions. Very different than the hammer of pain that started the day I had Lake and never let off. When my uterus was chill, I put my hair up, got my shoes on, and waddled to the car. At the hospital is the moment of truth all laboring mothers wait for: A nurse says, "Feet together, knees apart. Cold gel..." And you get the report of how far your cervix has dilated. Just 3 1/2 stinkin' centimeters! I had to be at least at a 4 to be admitted, which was like a cruel joke. Don't even say the "half" after three in that case, you guys. I'd rather not know.

The pleasant ride to the hospital. 

The midwife in labor and delivery gave me the option to either go home to continue laboring or walk around the hospital and see if things pick up. I chose the hospital. It was Indian day in the cafeteria. I love when hard decision are made for me. After curry, hiking the stairs, and leaning over every wall and surface in my given perimeters, I went back to have my cervix checked again. Low and behold, after 90 minutes I was still just at a 3 1/2. Feeling quite unskilled at willing my cervix into opening, I gave up and went home to labor. It actually was a blessing to be able to spend more time with Lake. I just wasn't ready to say good-bye to her yet!

At home I laid in my bathtub for an hour while Aaron poured water over my body. It was such a meditative time. The essential oils my doula put in the water helped me relax even though my contractions were getting much stronger. I found new coping techniques there in the bath. With each contraction I learned to stare at the back of my eyelids. Focusing on my eyes took my attention off my belly and brought it to my nose, then to my breath. I told myself, "This can only happen one breath at a time." It reassured me that I wasn't going to be swallowed up like the way waves crash over your head in the ocean with no room to come up for air. One breath in, one breath out, and it would be finished soon.

After getting out of the bath I felt amazing and rejuvenated, but my labor picked up insanely fast. Throughout the whole day Amanda was right there to apply counter pressure to my hips while I leaned on whatever was close by. It was an invaluable service. My birth with Lake was so unbelievably hard, but I did learn countless lessons from it. I learned to be present with my body and let things be just as they are. Wanting to be somewhere else is a way the mind creates unhappiness. I was getting to meet my baby that day, I couldn't tell myself to be unhappy if I tried.

It's baby day! 40 weeks and five days pregnant

No matter how hard my contractions got, I stayed present and at peace with the pain. I also learned from Lake's birth that my body does not respond to any pain killers during labor. So for me, a natural birth was the healthiest and best option. There are so many additional benefits to a natural birth for both myself and my baby girl so I was excited to meet the challenge! But still, pain demands to be felt. It doesn't have to win though. It doesn't have to make you lose control.

It was getting time to head back to the hospital when I started to hit that insanely intense transition phase of labor. And again, I knew what I needed to hear. It was time for me to plug in my headphones, strap on my fanny-pack, and blast my Jesus music. But right before the Meredith Andrews playlist started pumping, I took one last look at my affirmation board hanging in my room.

My board had an empty area in the bottom corner that I never knew what to write there. Still contracting up a storm, I remembered the words from a favorite sermon of mine. (I am more evangelical Jesus freak than Mormon some days.) Simply put, if something is a lie, but we believe it's true, it gives that lie weight and relevance in our lives. Even a lie becomes true after a while because you've given it power. Like how there is no truth to the notion that carrots improve your eyesight. But still knowing that, people live by it and it has power over their actions.

I thought about how intimidating giving birth was, especially naturally. I told myself that was only for endurance athletes or extra hippie mamas. But that's a lie! Not only could I do it, I was made to do it. So instead of believing a lie, I believed what God had to say. You buy into one story the world has told you your whole life, but when you realize it's untrue and things don't have to be that way, you get to write a totally different story for yourself. I can do what I always believed I couldn't. I wrote that down on my board and felt so empowered. It was like a door had been opened because I had just found the key.

On the car ride back to the hospital I listened to my music and never lost my cool, so for that I'm proud. But the transition phase does not mess around. Another affirmation that changed the course of my labor for the better was telling myself, "You exhale what you inhale." Every time I got close to those terrible mama shakes I told myself I am inhaling calmness and exhaling peace. There was no negativity or fear to be had because I was not allowing it!

As Aaron was parking the car and Amanda pushed me through the halls of the hospital, I had to just stop for a moment. I paused my music and broke down. Through my tears I told Amanda that if it looks like I'm crying because I'm in pain, it's not. I am just really happy. And I am just really grateful. God gave me this body and it's working exactly how it should be. I'm just so blessed to be a woman and know how I fit into God's plan right now. Amanda told me to quit it before I started to make her cry.

Aaron ran into the hospital room just as I laid down on the bed. Then feet, knees, cold goop...I was 8 centimeters dilated. Eight! I threw both my hands in the air and high-fived everyone. "Fill up the tub!" I had been waiting to labor in my own giant personal bath of delightfully balmy water since the morning. The things I've read about water birth have been ridiculously positive and encouraging. It was finally my turn to give it a try! I was so excited!

Within only three contractions after squatting down into the tub I told everyone that this baby is definitely coming sooner than they all thought. The position I was kneeling in was incredibly conducive to a baby falling out of me. I never want to give birth any other way again! I hesitantly said, "Um, Amanda? She's crowning." I didn't think anyone would believe me. My bag of waters was pushing down and I just needed to muster up a little more strength before my baby girl would be in my arms.

By 7:46 the evening of Gwen's birth I was relaxing with my arms over a birthing ball as I knelt inside my fabulous tub. MVP to that tub. With only seconds left before I met my sweet girl, my midwife, Julie, bent over and held my baby's head in her hands. I pictured my daughter's face with chubby cheeks and thick lips. Julie asked for one more push from me to free the baby's shoulders. Through the pain of my last contraction, I pictured the face of my new daughter again and couldn't think of anything else. A face that sweet took up too much room in my brain so I guess there was no place for pain to stay. With a final push, I sprung off the birthing ball and reached underneath my legs where I placed both my hands on my baby and brought her up out of the water to meet the world.

My hands were quickly joined by two other sets of hands as all three of us tried to unravel the umbilical chord wrapped around the baby's body. When she was safe, I pulled her into my chest. Amanda excitedly told me to speak to my baby, but I was at an absolute loss for words. I spoke to my new daughter, saying the only words I had on my lips all day. "I love you!"

I cannot begin to describe the joy in that moment. I was in shock. I was in love. Holding the child I've been praying for and thinking about since August turned me into an even bigger ball of tears. Aaron looked at us and told me he was so proud and what a beautiful baby I made. I really did make a beautiful one. I looked up at him and laughed, "Do you see her?!" She was really here. It was over. I did it. We made it. She was healthy and gorgeous. So gorgeous.

I love being a woman and knowing that I am trusted by God to raise such adorable girls like Lake and Gwen. There is an amazing transformation that happens when you just lay the will of something as crucial as the birth of your child at God's feet and let Him make it happen. God says blessed are those who are in need of comfort, for they will be comforted. That is true and I am proof. There were times when I was laboring in the tub I was so excited I declared, "This is fun!" It actually was.

My midwife Julie and doula Amanda. Phenomenal women. 
I could hardly rest for the remainder of our stay at the hospital. I believe I had a cumulative eight hours of sleep over three days. I'm not the type woman who just makes a human being and can go to sleep afterwards. Regardless of my fatigue, I have felt so fantastic and my recovery has been too good to be true. It was such a fantastic birth. I couldn't have asked for better midwives, nurses, or a better husband or doula.

It took a day or two for it to sink in that this baby with jet black hair and olive skin was really mine. She is too precious for words. I love her times infinity! I couldn't be more thankful for her safe arrival. It's been nerve racking waiting for Aaron to graduate next week, find a job, and move all of us into a new home. We don't know what will happen. But I'm at peace knowing I've got my two perfect, sweet girls and a loving man they can call their dad. I can see the ways the Lord has watched over us through each phase of our lives and especially through the birth of my two daughters. I've got my faith and I've got my family! Alright life, bring it on.

Sunday, April 10, 2016

Baby Machine

It is two days away from my due date. I am a happy, giant pregnant lady with no complaints! This pregnancy has been virtually unnoticeable compared to my pregnancy with Lake. The hardest part has honestly been trying to choose a name for this baby! I'm having a GIRL, in case you were wondering. Uggg, I don't like girls names. Why can't I just name her "Carah"? Why deviate from a classic?

Hello little baby! You are just 7 weeks along! 

I realized I was pregnant when I had a not even one year old yet. I was a little stressed. Did you know you can be breastfeeding, not have a period yet, AND be taking the pill and still get pregnant? Needless to say, the husband and I agreed to employing all forms of birth control and end each evening with a firm handshake.

I really am so in love with my babies though. Having another sweet newborn in this house is going to bring so much more joy to our lives. I can't wait!

A lot is happening these upcoming few months. Not only is there a baby to watch out for, Aaron is finally graduating from the U with his degree in Computer Science and we will have to find a job and new place to live. So if someone could just give Aaron a job back in Santa Monica where he's making loads of cash and I can frolic regularly on the beach with my two babes....that would be great. Plan B is to just eat away at our savings in Salt Lake until such an offer is made.

Plan C is to just take a job anywhere that offers him money, but that one's not nearly as exciting to think about.

Take me back! LA OR BUST!

Lake is now 18 months and she is a handful. That's just the truth. But I don't remember her ever being an "easy" baby. I don't know what I was expecting. But oh, yes. A baby sister rocking her single child world cannot be timed any better! She can already do the sign for baby, say "sissy!", and she attacks all babies smaller than her with pokes and kisses. They will be total best pals.

I'm counting down the hours I have left with just Lake. She is so bright and absolutely hilarious. Aaron and I can't get enough of her. She has mastered the cheesey smile that stops us in our tracks. It's the cutest. She knows something like 20 words now and it feels like she understands everything we're telling her. I like when she obeys me and thinks she deserves an applause break for herself.

This last year and a half as a mom has been such a blast. I think I am learning so much more about how God sees us as His children too. I love my little family. Like, LOOOOVE them. So come join us, baby sister! It's going to be a great eternity.

39 weeks, 5 days and 14 hours...but who's counting.

Monday, June 29, 2015

Nine Months of Lake

What the what? Where'd my little baby go? And who took my scrawny arms and replaced them with these buuuulging biceps?! Oh, the answer to both questions: My 24 pound nine month old.

A whole lot has changed in the last few months! Lake sleeps in a crib, I have a job, and it's hotter than Hades outside.

I love co-sleeping but it was time to let Lake be a big girl. I could tell she just wanted to sleep on her tummy and roll around at night. Now she finally goes to bed at a decent hour and sleeps all the way until the morning! I feed her maybe once in the early AM and put her back down then we both get a few more hours. Everyone in the house is happy, but I still love the times she naps on my chest so we can snuggle!

In April I was able to score a perfect job nannying for a family of three boys close by. I'm really loving it! I get to take Lake every day so it's like being paid to be a mom to my own child in someone else's house! It's helped me schedule and plan out my day so much better too. I do so much better when I know I have to be somewhere each day and can't just lay around the house avoiding those pesky adult responsibilities.

Last summer I was pregnant and miserable. It's so wonderful to be out in the sun without hating life and cursing the heat. But it is like intensely hot, people!

Now, let's get to the real reason I write not have to write and just post adorable pictures of my fat lil baby! Weeeeeee!
December to January - 4 Months

January to February - 5 Months

February - Five Months - I love these faces! She's so fun. 

March - 6 Months
March to April - 7 Months

April to May - 8 Months
May to June - 9 Months

Sorry, but I just had to post the poop picture! If I had to clean it, you at least have to see it! Hehe.

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

What I Love About Lake

February 19th, 2015  -  Five months

I love having Lake in my life.

She is five and a half months old and I love spending every day getting to know her. Lake definitely has a personality. She is so full of life! Babbling, rolling, gnawing, smiling, laughing, screaming. She's only quiet and out of trouble when I'm holding her. If she could talk she would be saying, "Yes, mother, I know you have things to do, but if you could just carry me at all times then I wouldn't have to whine and cry. And if you can't do that, then at least make constant eye contact with me not to be broken for even a split second! That's not asking too much, is it?!" And I do it.

Some of the things I love about Lake right now are as follows:

·First and foremost, the girl smells like Golden Grams. It is her natural scent. And this isn't just me talking, Aaron agrees as well. Every baby is different they say, well my baby is a cereal and she is delicious.

·The grocery store we go to a few times a week is the perfect place to put her in her Moby Wrap and walk the aisles. I love the time I get to spend with her hugged up against me with her head right at  perfect kissing level.

·At bath time she thinks it's so entertaining to kick her legs furiously until most of the water is splashed out.

·Lake loves to put her mouth on any and everything. Her toys are nice, but she is in Heaven if she can get her mouth on a bottle or jug, a diaper, the foot of her crib, my arm, my finger, my cheek bone, her hairbrush, material of any kind (preferably the kind that would most likely cause her to suffocate) and books. And this girl can roll! So even though she's not quite crawling, with her rolling skills she's put more things in her mouth than I can remember at this point.

·I love how Lake knows her daddy and gets excited when he walks in the door from school. Aaron picks her up and throws her in the air and she giggles like she's been saving all her best, cutest laughter for daddy.

·When Lake is really into a toy and just has laser concentration. That really is my favorite! I just love her staring at her pacifiers like she's about to make a serious breakthrough that will unlock all of the mysteries of the universe.

·We just got her a jumper that sits in the living room that keeps her so occupied! Even when she's had enough and wants out she still is jumping up and down steadily. It's like her mind is bored but her legs can't quit having all the fun.

·If Lake isn't sleeping, she's buzzing her lips and blowing bubbles. It's a constant. She just loves blowing raspberries and babbling until she's covered herself and anyone close by in her saliva.

·I have been waiting my whole life to snuggle a sleeping baby and Lake does not disappoint! She brings the snuggles. Holding a sleeping baby close is it's own natural high! I hope she stays this cuddly forever. I love how she wakes up and smiles so big at me like she's saying, "Ready to play now!"

·She makes it pretty easy when trying to get her to laugh. She laughs at dumb noises, funny faces, or just being picked up even. Watching Aaron dance really does it to her too. His silly, stupid dancing is always a hit!

Lake makes it easy to be her mom!
Now if she could cut back on the daily poopy blowouts, growing out of clothes (she is in size 18mo!), and waking me every hour in the night to nurse and snuggle...I would...LOVE HER THE EXACT SAME CAUSE LOOK AT THAT FACE.

January 27th, 2015 - Lake's first day rolling over!

A Year In Utah: Then to Now

The three years we had in California were the best of my life! From all the amazing jobs I was blessed with to our awesome ward. The weather. The hiking. The ocean breeze. It was a dream life. It's March now so that means exactly one year has passed since we left! I was three months pregnant and just starting to get on the other side of miserable morning sickness and fatigue when we departed from our blissful life in beautiful Santa Monica and moved into my parents basement in Provo. I couldn't even tell the difference at first! *sarcasm*

This is the story of then til now!

Carah Gets Pregnant
When I found out I was pregnant it was Friday, January 10th 2014. After a solid two years of trying unsuccessfully, I just let everything fall into place whenever I was meant to have a baby. Time finally passed so much faster and I felt more grateful for all of the amazing things and people in my life.

After two weeks of having my dearest friend Kendall stay with me, I realized I hadn't taken a pregnancy test for two weeks. Nothing big, nothing wild...I just peed on a stick and it told me I was a mom. I strutted into the bedroom where Aaron was laying down and pulled out the two pee sticks from behind my back! We couldn't believe it. Then we counted the months...February, March....4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9...September! We're having a baby in September! I was five weeks pregnant.

That week in January went like this:

Sunday: Kendall and Carah go hiking and a car pulls out and hits us on the way home and my car is totaled
Monday: Kendall and Carah have fun
Tuesday: Kendall and Carah have fun
Wednesday: Kendall and Carah have fun
Thursday: Kendall leaves back home to Utah and Carah is lonely
Saturday: I fly to Florida

It was an intense few weeks. Thankfully Kendall and I lived through the car crash and were still able to do fun things that week and it didn't affect the tiny little baby! I was listening to Christian music in the car. It protected us. Hallelujah!

The mom I nannied for from April 2013 to February 2014 is among my favorite people alive. She ranks pretty high. I love her. I love her husband. I love her baby. I love her dog. I just freaking loved that job. We talked nonstop about the glorious day when I would finally get my chance to be a mom. So it was with great excitement that the next day after I found out the news she picked me up from my house early in the morning to leave for a business trip to Orlando with her for the week.

In the car was the whole troop. Christine, Ross, baby Charlotte and the lovable dog, Reiley. The sun wasn't quite up yet when I threw my suitcase in the trunk and then opened Charlotte's door to say hello. I patted Charlotte's head and said, "Ahhh! I can't wait until I get one of these in nine months!" *pause with giant grin on my face* We all screamed and they congratulated me. And that's how I remember what day my unbearable nausea started.

February was was doozy. I literally think I laid in bed the entire month except for one trip I took with Christine to Santa Barbara, one dinner out when my parents were in town for my 25th birthday, and a trip to the doctors to see our baby! Those were not pleasant times. But listening to my baby's heartbeat and just holding on to the future I would have with my future child gave me so much happiness I managed to get through it.

February 6th, 2014
At the doctor's office getting my first ultrasound!

Hi frog looking baby! You are 9 weeks along!

March 4th, 2014
13 weeks pregnant
The announcement we posted for everyone to see! 
With a baby coming, we realized Aaron needed to go back to the U to finish his degree in Computer Science if he was going to adequately provide for this baby. My boss decided to quit her job to stay at home with her daughter right at the time I felt too sick to work so everything worked out for the best!

Pregnancy for me was not pretty. I was pregnant through three seasons and spent the whole summer indoors hiding from the heat. The most difficult trial in my pregnancy were the painful rashes on my arms and chest that made me lose my mind. Things got better when I stopped wearing a bra though! (When in doubt about anything, take off your bra and life will improve. Works every time.) 

Hard Symptoms of Pregnancy Include:

·The itchiest most insane rashes on my chest and arms
·Sickening nausea for the first five months
·Hunger pains that woke me up multiple times a night to eat and eat and eat
·Painfully swollen feet and hands including carpel tunnel and completely numb fingers

Then you add constant trips to the bathroom, feeling like an ugly whale all the time, and never having anything to wear and you've got me! But even as I type this, Lake sits babbling next to me on the bed and for her...I'd do it again in a heartbeat! It's weird. I didn't have any bad heartburn or anything like that so I count myself lucky in that regard. I am actually extremely lucky because I was able to get my back worked on once a week by a massage therapist and a chiropractor to correct things from my car accident which made this pregnancy much more bearable

I think if I learned anything from those long, drawn out months waiting for Lake to arrive it's that I can't sit around waiting for life to begin. Because now that Lake is here I could just as easily get discontent and choose to set my sights on when Aaron graduates as the marker for when I will start living. I want to experience every day with excitement in whatever season of my life I'm in. So I just remember to ask myself, "What do I love doing? What makes me happy?" Then I can go for walks, hike, go to the temple, read books, play with my niece and nephews, visit friends, and get projects done so I feel like I made that day count! 

I mean, I did a few things while I was pregnant that I was proud of. I learned to code and built a website for my dad's framing business! I also woke up early on the weekends to go to garage sales where I scored so many marvelous baby items! But I'd say just growing a human was productive in itself. 

I got my prenatal care from the amazing American Fork midwife group at Valley Obstetrics and Gynecology. Six midwives rotated appointments each time I came in so I got to know a whole team of amazing women! I was always so excited for my prenatal check ups! 
Next time I'm pregnant, I hope I'm in Utah so I can get my care through them again! I count my blessings everyday that Lake was healthy and the entire pregnancy had zero concerns or complications! 

At our 18 week appointment we got to find out our baby's gender and it was one of the most thrilling days of my life! I thought I was definitely going to have a boy, but when that ultrasound screen came up and they said my growing baby was a girl I forgot all notions about boys and couldn't wait to meet my DAUGHTER!

13 weeks
18 weeks

April 9th, 2014  -  18 weeks 
Found out Carah Jr. is on her way!
April 18th  -  19 weeks and June 7th, 2014  -  26 weeks
Yay to having friends with babies! Ameri was about two months ahead of my pregnancy. Here we are at her baby shower holding the little quilt I sewed for baby Bellamy! 

June 15th, 2014  -  28 weeks

July 4th, 2014  -  30 weeks
July 28th  -  33 weeks
July 31st  -  33 weeks

August 7th  -  35 weeks
The baby shower at Mary Lee's house was amazing beyond my wildest dreams! I can't even explain. You just had to be there.
August 16th, 2014  -  37 weeks
Aaron and I drove back to LA for a week. I really missed California. 
September 8th, 2014  -  39 weeks
Mary Lee is such a treasure. She took my full grown tummy and painted a Henna masterpiece! 
So hard not to laugh while getting painted by that woman though...

41 weeks
Waiting for my little girl.

Carah Has a Baby 
I went into labor on the morning of September 19th. Bringing Lake into this world was the hardest thing I have ever done, but I would do it over just to feel that matchless joy of meeting her again. She was so perfect. I was in love. I will never be able to find the words, but I wrote a few more over here.  

Holding this tiny, incomprehensible miracle in my arms for the first time. 

September 20th, 2014  -  1 day old
Her lips are so gorgeous. She takes my breath away!
Lake's birth announcement  

The Burrells Move to Salt Lake
We have made it to the end of the story! We are now in Salt Lake and I have a five month old baby who is rolling and laughing and still keeping me up all night. 

After ten months of living in Provo it was time to move closer to the U for Aaron. January 8th we packed up and moved into the married student housing on campus where we already resided from 2009 to 2011. There are about 60 different housing blocks we could have been assigned to but we got placed exactly. below. our. old. apartment. It was like a sick joke. But even though our apartment number is just one digit off from our old number and I mix them up all the time and even though our church starts at 9am when we just endured a year of 9am church...I know this place will be a good home for us as we start our new life as a family of three! 

This has been the best year of my life because it gave me the chance to be a mother. I love Aaron so much and I love seeing him as a father. He is so involved with Lake and cherishes every moment he spends with her. He exceeded my expectations as a husband and now as a father to our baby girl. Seeing Aaron as he rocks Lake to sleep or makes her giggle furiously really taps me out on love for him. He is just too good. 

This is just the beginning of our life as parents. I know there is so much more for us three and I honestly just can't wait to see what life has in store! More children to have, more love to give, more patience to increase, more places to visit. We have so many more decisions to make and paths to walk down but now we can do it all together! The future can be scary when it's so uncertain, but as long as I can squeeze these two forever, I've got all I need!  

February 8th, 2014
Daddy, Mommy, and Lakey

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Lake Hannah Burrell...What Else IS There?

Lake is three months and my newborn is gone! She is a smiling, laughing, chunk of a kid and gosh golly I just love her. She's got an amazing dad who takes care of her and is really in love with her too. Lake thinks its cool to wake up every hour at night. Hilarious actually. I have no idea how to put a baby on a schedule.'s finally failed me. But look at that smile!