Thursday, April 21, 2011

Terrrrrrible Twos

I swear I'll never have two year olds. I am just going to adopt all my kids starting at age three. I babysit in the morning for a one year old boy, Michael, and two year old girl, Nicole. Two year olds are just like babies but slightly older so they can run faster, scream louder, spit their food farther, take bigger craps in their diapers, climb higher to destroy more, talk back, give opinions, hit and kick you harder, and have the skills to do mischievous things and know better so they can hide the evidence from you. All of which happens on a daily basis when I babysit Nicole. Break down crying? Yeah, today I did. A person can only take so much screaming (I'm talking 'bout ear deafening sccccreaming) before a mental break down is at hand.

Nicole still isn't potty trained but she has perfect speech. There is nothing like a kid that can walk up and say, "I need to poop." Stand right there and poop, completely aware of their bodily functions, then go get a new diaper and wipes, lay down, then when they're done being changed say, "Thank you Carah!" with perfect diction and pronunciations. Let's learn some new words, shall we? Like toilet.

Moral of the story: I'm never giving birth to an infant that is prone to developing into a two year old.

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